Love is so much more than romance. It serves as a source of strength, resilience, and motivation for partners facing obstacles in their romantic journey.
Love carries with it a continuous rhythm of highs and lows. It encompasses care, respect, understanding and commitment, which are all essential for a long lasting relationship.
Love is not perfect. Depending on the couple, individual flaws are more noticeable by the 3rd year. It used to be the 7th year when we noticed the annoying things about each other!
Here are my 10 observations of what I’ve learned about love and what makes a strong and long-lasting relationship:
- Be open and honest. Of all the people in the world, you should be able to trust your partner completely. Your partner is ideally also your best and truest friend. NEVER hide things from your loved one.
- Openly communicate without fear. This goes along with being open and honest. If you have any fear about opening up to your partner, you’re either in the wrong relationship, or you need self evaluation to discover why fear is present. For example, you may fear retribution or abandonment if you state your opinion.
- Navigating arguments, differences of opinion and conflicts. There really is a thing about learning how to fight fair! Don’t accuse. Yell. Scream. Point fingers or Blame. Allow each other to have a say without interrupting (a hard one).
- Cheerleading and supporting. If your partner has a dream, don’t shoot it down, support them in the best way possible. If your partner had a bad day, cheer them up…or just simply listen and let them unload.
- Be there for each other when life gets hard. Life DOES get hard: loosing loved ones, family hardships, accidents, sickness, financial loss, loosing your job. Let each other know you’re in it together, and together you can do anything….that and a warm HUG go a long way to comfort each other.
- Be kind and considerate towards one another. Be careful to treat your partner as well as you treat your best friends and family. It’s easy to get annoyed with someone you are with 24/7, but do your best to be considerate of each others feelings. Protect your union!
- Compromise. This is such an important skill to have in any relationship, especially a romantic one. There must be give and take in the relationship. Find the middle ground that works so both of you are valued in the compromise…then STICK to it!
- Sense of Humor. Where would all of us be without some levity and sense of humor about life? Sharing laughter and memories together is one of life’s pleasures. This is must. It’s ok, if your humor is sarcastic, as long as you’re not secretly digging at the other person under the guise of humor.
- Patience and Grace. Need I say more? You don’t know the scope of patience until you are tested in this area! My test came 3 years after my hubby was diagnosed with Alzheimers. Patience is an absolute must, and requires a different type of love. Practice patience and grace as much as possible. You’ll need it with yourself as well as for others as you move forward in life.
- Intimacy. This goes beyond sexual intimacy. True intimacy and closeness is created when you are willing to share the deepest and most complex parts of your inner self with your partner.
Lastly…Let there be a healthy balance of joy and conflict. Joy is what makes life worth living, and conflict teaches you about yourselves and you’ll grow as a result. Keep the communication flowing and don’t let there be long cold silences between you, that is surely the death of any relationship!
